Drowning

My mind is gone- and so is my body slowly.
It's wasting away. More and more each day.
My eating disorder hit me right in the face when I was searching.
For peace.
"Here I am, you can easily use me to cope with all that right now".
And that's what I did.

I'm slowly killing me. Not only by eating around ** to *** kcal each day, but also by drinking nearly nothing. And the problem is- I don't even care. I just want to be gone. No, that's not the right word for it. I want to be found.
Found.
I want someone to see me before I disappear. But at the same time, I don't want anybody to ever think about MY stuff, MY problems, MY life. It's a trap.
It's a trap.
A Trap.
In which I stepped in a long time ago.
And never cared enough to get out again.