Caged!

What is this whole world and life about?!
I don't get the sense of it.
I don't get anything of it.
And I don't know how to change, how to make it better.
How to make it work, this whole world and life.
My life.
At the moment it's not a life, it's more a chaos.
A chaos of feelings, emotions, perceptions and sorrows.
It is all that I never wanted.
I don't want it like that.
I want life to be beautiful.
I want to feel life.
I want to taste life.
I want to hear life.
I want to smell life.
I want to LIVE life.
Please, give this life back to me...
I want it so badly.

But I just can't go back to it on my own.
I'm like in a cage.
I can walk inside it, there is enough space.
But it isn't like a real life.
It is always just being there but not taking part in anything.
You can just watch from the inside of your cage.
You can watch them outside, but you will never be a part of it.
NEVER!

It's the soul cage.