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Dienstag

Ooooh.

I'm really sorry for not posting since quite a "long time".
I promise I will be more active from now...


I hope you all had a wonderful weekend
and you had time to relax from school or work.




















Mittwoch

Neverland.

It's kind of a "song-love".
And I don't even know why.
But I love this song's rhythm.
I just love how this song makes me move inside.
And it makes me dream.
It makes me dream of a Neverland.

I mean, what would you do if.... if everything's so fucked up and you....
You just don't know what to do?

- I'll stop eating until they take me to hospital.

Do you know what hurts the most about a broken heart?
Not being able to remember how you felt before.
Try to keep that feeling because if it goes, you'll never get it back.

That's people, Chris. They get to know you, see what they like and leave.

Do you remember when you rode with me in the ambulance after I tried to kill myself?
                  - Of course.
That's what love feels like.

                  
Death is not the greatest loss in life.
The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.

Dienstag

Feels like Dying.

He came back.
Took his clothes.
Went away.
Left his traces.
Deep in my heart.
Deep in my soul.
Deep in my arm.
Forever.

And she, she acts as if nothing ever happened.

I don't wanna be here, anymore.


Sonntag

But in the end it doesn't even matter.

Never ending love.

Each creature is connected to another
and every being is held by another.

I love you.
You will always be the one for me.
No matter where I am or where you are.
You and me. Forever.
Sometimes your life feels like it's caving in on you.
Sometimes people really do feel like they don't want to exist,
like they want to just curl up in a ball,
and go into that place between life and death.
Saying "I don't want to exist" isn't saying "I want to go die".
It's saying "I wish that, for the time being, I could go somewhere
and not have to feel".
I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
And if you don't know how it feels to feel this way,
then you have no place to judge anyone who does.

Creep.

I don't care if it hurts,
I want to have control.
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul.
I want you to notice when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special.

What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.

Samstag

And it's all my fault!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Montag

Isolation.

Be my friend,
Hold me, wrap me up.
Unfold me,
I am small.
I'm needy,
Warm me up
And breathe me.

Wow....Lovely.

Effy-Mood.

Mittwoch

HATE!

I hate her!
I would really like to kill her right now!
She is destroying everything!
I mean why is she looking through my things?
I she kidding me!
I hate her!
I hate her.
I mean....She is my MOTHER.
Doesn't she have TRUST in me?
I really don't know what to do right now.
I am like freaking out!
Where to go with all this hate when she actually took everything away from me??

This isn't a mother anymore, it is a MONSTER!
I hate her, I hate her so bad!

Daily lies.

Life.

There will always be a "lie" in believe
an "over" in lover
an "end" in friends
an "us" in trust
and an "if" in life.

So there is always the possibility to choose, IF you want to live.

And I am not sure about it yet.
Because I am not sure if I want to live like that.

And IF I want to live again, and I don't mean just being on this world, I mean to LIVE,
then I know that I need to change something.
But right now I don't know how to change it.
And I don't know if I really WANT to change something
because this became the way my life is.
This life became my habit, this way of life,
this horrible way of life.

Donnerstag

You're the one.

I remember the days we spent together
were not enough
and it used to feel like dreamin'
except we always woke up.
Never thought not having you
here now would hurt so much.

Tonight I'm falling and I can't get up.
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you.
I can just look up
and know the stars are
holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight.


I love you, my Fröschli.

Just amazing.
















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I think she is one of the most beautiful blogger I've ever seen.
She has a fantastic sense for fashion ( I love it anyway ),
she is blessed with the beauty of a fairy or topmodel ( I'm not quite sure about that yet),
has an enormous talent for photography and....
I guess there is just one word to describe her:

AMAZING!!!!

Go and visit her blog, you won't regret it,
I PROMISE!

An inconvenient truth.

When I was 5 years old,
my mom always told me that happiness was the key to life.
When I went to school,
they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.
I wrote down "happy".
They told me I didn't understand the assignment and I told them
they didn't understand life!

Thinking of you.




Mittwoch

Because I miss those days.









I miss the days we were together.
I miss the days on which we just lay in bed, laughing, talking, watching movies.
I miss the feeling when we were together.

Because you are everything to me.
And you will always be.

"When I see your smile,
tears run down my face.
I can't replace.
And now that I'm stronger, I have figured out,
how this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul.
And I know I'll find deep inside me,
I can be the one.

I will never let you fall.
I'll stand up with you forever.
I'll be there for you through it all.
Even if saving you sends me to heaven.

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart.
Please don't throw that away.
Cuz I'm here for you.
Please don't walk away,
please tell me you'll stay, stay....."

I love you, my dearest friend.
I will always love you and I hope that you know.
You are the one for me.